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    Pre-Marital and Marriage Counseling

    Did you just get engaged?

    Are you a newlywed?

    Have you been married for several years? Decades?

    Are you and your partner looking to take your relationship to the next level?

    Would you like to develop a stronger psychological foundation to build your marriage upon?

    When you’re considering marriage, deciding on your honeymoon or figuring out where you want to live are among the first things you start to plan. Premarital counseling might be last on your list, if it’s there at all. While it’s not an engagement topic that’s very fun or romantic, premarital counseling and marriage counseling can set your marriage up to succeed and survive long-term, in spite of the odds.

    Both pre-marital and marriage counseling can help you and your partner improve your relationship by helping you develop better communication skills, learn conflict management, uncover your shared core values as well as identify differences that could create future conflict. Working with a therapist, you can discuss expectations with your partner that will help better prepare both of you for marriage and hopefully enhance your life together if already married.

    If one or more of the following relates to your situation:

    •   You and your partner have arguments that don’t get resolved
    •   You feel like you’re always the one who has to compromise to keep the peace
    •   You’re concerned about how your partner’s financial situation will affect you as a married couple
    •   You’re worried about losing affection or having a diminished sex life after marriage
    •   You want to find healthier ways to resolve conflict
    •   You want to resolve religious or financial differences
    •   You want to define your marital roles and expectations

    … then counseling can be a great benefit to both you and your partner.

    The intimate nature of marriage requires that you talk to your partner about what your real experience is, no matter how awkward or uncomfortable. In order to be more intimate and close, premarital counseling and marriage counseling can help you learn how to be a better listener, and how to communicate in a way that your voice and your partner’s voice are heard in a safe, productive and positive way.

    When you live with someone, you will have disagreements ranging from the very mundane to more serious issues. How you navigate all of this will be a part of the story of how you are as a couple. You can learn how to de-escalate arguments and how to fight fairly, so you don’t cause emotional pain from things you said that you’ll never be able to take back.

    In pre-marital counseling and marriage counseling, we will likely bring up topics that you’ve discussed with your partner previously, as well as subjects you hadn’t considered before. This fresh perspective from an objective third party will uncover new details from your partner. This is also an excellent time for us to find unexpected areas where you disagree, and give you the tools to handle possible future conflict.

    Doing this work will also help you discover hidden strengths in your relationship. We absolutely want to discover those strengths and build upon them. It’s not just about looking at the negative.

    Getting married is one of life’s most treasured experiences. Premarital counseling can help you and your partner turn that momentous occasion into a loving, lasting relationship.

    Remember, even in the very best of relationships, there are going to be the inevitable challenges that life throws at us.

    My wife and I, married for more than 30 years, participated in both pre-marital and marriage counseling to help us build a strong psychological foundation to our marriage. We have certainly experienced or own ups and downs but, looking back, both of us wholeheartedly agree that our couples counseling was more than worth the investment. Having built that foundation, our marriage is stronger and much more fulfilling than even we could have imagined. It’s not that we are free of challenges in life, but we are in a much better position to navigate them because of the psychological foundation we built.

    If any of this resonates with you, I invite you to reach out and contact me today to schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if I am a good fit for what you are looking for in a couples therapist.